sick of the time

just last night I recalled what roco had told us in the meeting that we held on the day he announced to the public that he was sick and that he was going to the states to have his medical treatment: "wag mawawalan ng pag-asa".

Simple message outside the realm of verbosity, but too deep that man, particularly Filipinos, cant seem to comprehend.

Today is the sick of the time. Everything is the sick of the time. Confuse me more and it aint be good enough.

The people are tired I know, but somehow I hope they'd never lose it-hope. As one had been continuously reminding us: "let it not be said no one from our generation raged against the dying of the light".

Now as I have recalled roco and one of the gazillion of teachings he had impressed on me, I began to once again ask myself have been losing it?

People, even my own dad had told me that what we are fighting for is utterly impossible. I understand them. More often than not, when a body is tired, the spirit conks out. And when it does, it starts to deny every lil ounce of should-have's and would-have's till nothing is left where cynicism start to reside.

A year after roco died, I realized that my dad was correct, that it aint that easy as reading the doctrines in my book. the reality is far more wrenching than what I read in the dailies and from what I see with my eyes. but somehow I have got to be there and hang on. because it is far more better to do the impossible rather than do nothing at all.

searching for barret-browing

Have you ever tried staring at your ceiling doing and thinking about nothing, and then in your sojourn with dreamland with eyes wide open you stick your finger up your nose to look for some junkie stuff. try ninyo masarap.

hehe

Pardon me for my nonsensical write-ups. months after I finished my term in the school paper and after immersing myself in tons of statutory readings, I find myself groping for whatever inspiration I can get to at least write something that is of significant, if not to my society, but at least to the fish I have in the fridge.. uggghhhh goddam get my pen paper for me please! teach me how to write again!

non-sense

today is supposed to be my innitiation rites in the lex leoum fraternitas, but fortunately or unfortunately, i am flaring with 38.6 degree fever. so that means my rites will be deferred till the next batch of neophites come in.

because of this fever i will not be able attend my class in criminal law, fortunately!

it has been months since i contracted such fever, i am no longer accustomed to the feelings. hay, this sweater sucks, why cant i feel better? hachu!!!!!!!

sunshine

you said you see yourself standing before the fields with blurred idea as to what is there that doesnt meet the eye. you said that you can stand gladly in middle of the field to learn what is there that you still need to know. you said you'd be glad to stare your kids in the eye and tell them that life 's gonne be okay. you said you see the leaves fall, you see the birds die, you see the world twist and turn into endless night and day. you said you see yourself standing in the midst of the unknown strong in the hands of the one who holds you.

you said you see life as it starts... because it is already ours...

an open letter to no one

i have a theory... man by nature is evil and it is only in one man's conscious desire to change that he becomes a part of those who have gave in to the phenomenon we call goodness.

just this saturday, when i arrived home from a restless day in law school i was hoping that i could sit down and chill for a while as my girlfriend and i take the opportunity to have a very good conversation without thinking about my recitation the next day, which has become a rare commodity these days. but things never went the way i wanted because you and your friend called and asked if the two of us could talk. your friend approached me nicely that, for respect in her polite approach, i never had the face to turn her down.

i understand your reactions and your outrage. somehow during that time when you were throwing invectives at me over the line i realized that you deserve that moment. yes, indeed i became such a jerk before, and indeed i have hurt you in many ways you could ever imagine, but hell, it was a good four-year span already. much has changed in us, and i have left everything that reminds me of the thing that we had in the past.

i dont want to apologize anymore for what i have done since i know i sincerely have done so in the past. whether you have accepted it, just the way you purported, or not, i no longer give a big damn. i can only be evil once or twice in my life, but cannot be evil for the entirety of it. if after that four years that we have stayed apart you have opted to remain were i left you, then that is no longer my fault. you have brought it to yourself, and the shitty things i have done to you are in no way a part of that anymore.

move on so your friends and i have told you. your reasons for turning a deaf's ear may justify for doing such, but i could no longer be held accountable for that. at least not in the conflicts that you have brought against yourself.

i will no longer write here what you have done to me, instead for the rest of this whatever i will just ask you to carry on with your life. this is bye bye now. just like what you wanted, i hope not to see you again, i hope not to hear from you again. if ever we will bump into each other someday, which i doubt we would, be rest assured that i would act as if you are a complete stranger... unknown...

i hope you'll be ok... i am happy now. move on...

sunshine

ask me where i am heading and you'll see, that everything leads to you...

sunshine

ask me where i am heading and you'll see, that everything leads to you...

times like this is rare now. it felt like the old maxim proved to be correct once again: CR lang ang pahinga. later i will stop and reach for that darn revised penal code again, but for now i think ill surf a lil bit more.

dont you find it utterly boring when in your ride home no one get ran off by a bulldozing maniac, or in your eternal time in the library to study codal provisions,or whatever, no one farts hard? i wonder how it would look like if i trip off my dean in the college of law... hhhmmmm

slacking around

three weeks in law school and i feel like i have lost a kilo already. in that span of three weeks a lot had happened:
1. i find my writing degenrates into mere simplistic wanna-be
2. i have read an aggregate of 62 cases in constitutional law, criminal law, and persons family relations.
3. in light of these 62 cases, i have read almost a thousand page of supreme court resolutions annotated or SCRA.
4. i have read an aggregate of almost a thousand page of 1987 constitution of the republic of the philippines by fr. bernas, philippine political law of justice cruz, civil code of justice paras, persons and family relations of atty sta maria. persons and family relations of atty pineda, statutory construction of atty agpalo, revised penal code annotated of atty reyes.
5. i have read a hundred of codal provisions, which i think only half of them are still fresh in my memory. mmm lets see: sec 4 of art 17 of the philippine constitution states that any ammendment to, or revision of, this constitution under section 1 hereof, shall be valid upon ratification of majority of the votes cast in a plebiscite, which shall be held not earlier than 60 days, nor later than 90 days after the approval of such amendment or revision. amendments under section 2 hereof shall be valid upon ratification of majority of the votes cast in a plebiscite, which shall be held not earliear than 60 days, nor later than 90 days after the certification of the commission on elections on the sufficiency of the petition.

art 19 of the civil code states that every person must, in the the exercise of their rights and the performance of their obligations, act with..... damn nakalimutan ko na... see....

but i am not complaining. im enjoying it